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June 01, 2003

The Matrix Reloaded

So, I saw the new Matrix today. I didn't even Kazaa it. I went to a real theater (not the fancy one I was telling Bard about. I went to one closer to my house). First of all, I should say I'm a big fan of the original. I even bought the enhanced DVD package when I had the plain DVD. I wasn't expecting the sequel to be as good. Sequels are never as good (well, barring the Star Wars series and the Indiana Jones series. I think those sequels are better. The prequels suck but that's another topic). I *was* expecting it to be a good film. Was it? Hardly. I hated it. Someone had told me the special effects were cheesy. I don't think the specials effects were cheesy. I think they were kind of cool (not as impactful as the first because we saw most of them there). The story was stupid, cheesy and horrendously boring. I don't mean the ending, I mean the whole thing. I haven't read Bard's spoiler yet, but here's mine . . .

*Spoiler**

First of all, I get that there had to be a love story thing going on between Trinity and Neo, but wtf? Why did they have to make it so cheesy? "I won't let go!" My god, I wanted the robots to come in and kill them both. It's "The Matrix" not "Bridges of Madison County." The sex scene was also uncalled for. I know that I joke that Keanu Reeves looks hot in "The Matrix," and that's the best special effect ever but come on. Nobody wants to see that. Also, what was up with the scene where he was kissing that chick? I didn't see a point to that at all (maybe it will come back, I'm assuming the annoying kid who reminded me a Dell intern will. I'm really looking forward to that {/sarcasm}). Even if there was a point, gees. Don't these people get that this is Sci-fi and I, for one, don't want to see a close up of someone tonguing in Sci-fi?

They also had some very, very cheesy lines of dialogue in the thing. I wish I had taken notes. Some supposedly serious one caused me to laugh out loud. The whole thing where they went to the engineering level and tried to make a subtle *cough* point about man's dependance on technology was one such scene. I think the movie was trying too hard to make a statement. There were a lot of scenes where, unlike the first, it didn't encourage you to think, it told you to and it told you exactly what to think about.
Secondly and probably most importantly, they ruined the story. Saying Neo is a programming anomaly in it's 6th version is akin to saying the force is caused by dust mites (midochlorians or whatever, same thing). It's just not want you want to hear. I didn't expect Neo to save the world in this one because I know there's a third but they could have thought of something better than getting man who reminded me of Santa Claus to tell Neo Morpheus is wrong. With all the religious symbolism from the first, I'm sure the zealots could say there's religious implications in that but I just like the movie and I think it ruined it. And, I didn't get how he knew what was going to happen. Neo base of operation outside of the Matrix and is no longer part of the "program" so to speak. He's a hacked program. Is Zion a part of the Matrix too? They didn't imply that it was. There is no way he could know, like he implied, what was going to happen to Zion before Neo choose or even after. One would think that Neo's original programming had been changed. Unless Zion is, indeed, a part of the Matrix and imaginarly like everything else. In which case, the whole movie series sucks and I want my money back.

I also didn't like Zion. You've been there for a 100 years, learn how to make a freakin' washing machine. WTF did they all have ring around the collar for? Gees.

Posted by vixen at 11:39 PM | Comments (0)